Thursday, July 5, 2012

Caught Being Good

Do you want to raise a responsible well-behaved child? You can - by helping them develop good character traits. I still have parents thank me for giving them the idea to use a marble jar as a reward system. Our kindergarten classroom's jar was filled as the class received compliments from staff, parents, high school helpers, substitutes, i.e. anyone 16 or over.  It took about a month for the class to fill the jar. When it was full, my husband and daughter made cupcakes to celebrate. The children were so proud that they had earned those cupcakes, even though they only cost a few dollars to make. Other class rewards could be to let them vote on a short movie, take a long walk or play a new game outside, and extend center or recess time.



Behavior Management with Kids


For preschoolers, or at home, use a smaller jar so that it can be filled in about a week's time. The children can also learn math as you count the marbles. They will have a visual hands-on reward system. Let them help decide the reward. Sometimes spending special one-on-one time is much more beneficial than spending money. I was humbled when my daughter's kinder teacher told me that her favorite thing to do was to play dollhouse with me - no money or transportation was necessary, just some playful one-on-one time expanding our imaginations and relaxing in pretend play.

BUILDING GOOD CHARACTER
Children need to learn good character traits in order to gain respect and trust from those around them. Then they will gain a sense of pride in their abilities boosting self- confidence. You can encourage character growth in your child by using, recognizing, requiring, and emphasizing the right attitudes, words, and actions. This is best done by example. Communicate realistic age-appropriate expectations and hold your child accountable to teach responsibility.

The following is quoted from  PlayDrMom's Readathon post: "Positive reinforcement works … and also helps foster independence, life skills, and self-esteem.  It focuses more on mutual respect than power-differentials. Punishing (such as time-outs and taking away privileges) works too and it is sometimes needed, but if positive behaviors are reinforced regularly there will be less of a need for the punishments … and in turn less power struggles.... Implementing positive behavior strategies in daily family life can not only help eliminate problematic behaviors, but can give children a sense of control and help decrease parental stress.  Verbal praise, simply talking about progress made, and showing the pride you have in your children can go a long way in helping your child’s character development. "  To read the full article, click Promoting Positive Parenting.

To read my series on Discipline, click Prevent Inappropriate Behavior

 

Sisters displaying good character traits while reading: Sharing, caring, good example
  The truth of the matter is that you always know
the right thing to do. The hard part is doing it.”
~ H. Norman Schwarzkopf, Am. General

For a glimpse into Kindergarten see my book. Would you like inexpensive ideas, activities, and games to teach your child through play? Mommy with Selective Memory and I can help save your sanity, one project at a time, with The Happy Mommy Handbook: The Ultimate How-to Guide on Keeping Your Toddlers and Preschoolers Busy, Out of Trouble and Motivated to Learn. Both have been number 1 bestsellers on Amazon and are helpful gifts for parents and teachers. Also available on Barnes & Noble and Kobo.








What ideas would you like to add?

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16 comments:

  1. what a great post susan! thanks for sharing! I love the marble jar idea and I think my daughter would too!

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    1. Thank you! Marbles come in different sizes so we used the bigger ones for compliments from the principal or teachers in special areas, or cafeteria staff - when they were away from the classroom. I think it was fun because it taught them joint cooperation. Love your blog!

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  2. Susan- I cannot wait to start this tomorrow! My kids have told me two nights in a row they are sorry for being bad. Ugh. Traveling has resulted in a contant harping on them, I see. I want to also reinforce the good that they do and we will start this TOMORROW!!!! Thank you!

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    1. Tricia - great! Let me know how it works. Marbles can be fascinating to children - plus they can visually see them accumulate and take pride in their behavior. I never took any marbles out for bad behavior. Sure was tempted - but it's best to keep encouraging them to earn more marbles. Thanks for visiting!

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  3. This is a great way to work on great character traits!

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    1. Thank you so much. I enjoy your Readathon posts too - and the spiritual ones - well, they're all good.

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  4. Lovely ideas here and I shall be coming back to study them as we need to introduce a reward system that works!

    Thank you so much for sharing on Family Frolics. :)

    Kerry

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. Multiplemummy - Let me know how it works with the marble jar (you might like my series on Discipline). My daughter likes sticker charts and core check off lists (visuals). Bet you are soooo busy at your house. Thanks for stopping by and for the Linky Parties!

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  5. Susan, this post really resonates with me! I love seeing other teachers use positive reinforcement with their students. I have been teaching for over 20 years, and I feel that a smile or a simple compliment goes such a long way. I know some teachers do not feel comfortable touching a child's shoulder, but I think that also really allows you to bond with them very quickly. I also agree totally with you that we should lead by example. On the rare occasions when I get upset with somebody in the class or on staff, I model for the children taking a minute to breathe and calming down. One of my pre-k students this year remarked "Wow, you really do what you tell us to do!" My students have also learned to be very helpful and empathetic because of my disability.

    Thank you so much for posting this. It was very helpful. I would be so happy if you could come over and visit my blog.

    Your latest follower,
    Sharon Dudley, NBCT
    http://teachingwithsight.blogspot.com

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  6. Sharon Dudley - your blog is amazing: Teaching with Sight. I am so impressed with your talent and gift with children. I watched your video and can tell you are passionate about teaching children and appreciate all that they can teach us. Thank you so much for visiting my blog. I am your newest follower and fan!

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    1. Susan, you are very sweet, and also very amazing yourself. Please stay in touch.

      Sharon Dudley, NBCT
      http://teachingwithsight.blogspot.com

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  7. I remember marble jars when I was in school! Great post Susan, and a great idea to use with my kiddos. Thanks for sharing with The Sunday Showcase.

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    1. Thank you for hosting those fabulous linky parties!

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  8. Positive reinforcement is always a great plan. Another tool is the Caught Being Good app available on iTunes. Check out the website at www.CaughtBeingGoodApp.com

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  9. I usd to have a compliment chain when I tought elementary school. If another adult complimented the class on their behavior outside the classroom (cafeteria, walking in the hall, specials) then we would add a link to the chain. After so many links the class earned some type of reward. This promoted not only good behavior, but team work!

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